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She is dating The Paxton Hall-Yoshida! 'Course you can. No joke, no leering, no inappropriate comment. Everyone stared at Peter for a solid five seconds. They just lie there, entangled, and slowly drift off. And how you've managed to get him onto your side in nearly every single dispute since., Tony tries to look hurt, although he's doing a shit job at it, one hand dramatically resting against his chest in a who, me? How on Earth did you manage that? Natasha says, arms folded against her chest, exuding disapproval of the situation but also a hint of intrigued curiosity that only Clint would be able to pick up on. The silence prompts Clint to pry open his eyes. A shit-eating grin covered his face. Right., Really, Cap? Tony grimaces. But now he has a girlfriend who picked him and his parents are speaking to him somewhat regularly. AU of the avengers where they are all in highschool in present time and it will probably not go anywhere but enjoy anyway lol. Because Clint's gotta be honest; that thought freaks him out just a little. I don't know, I've hung out with Nat too much.". set in senior year, following canon season 3 (and assuming that ben and devi get together after it.). You can't do that!" It means the chances that I'll ever get in bed with you are depressingly low. He takes a sulking swig of his bottle, and Steve looks adorably confused. What she didn't expect, however, was to catch the eye of a devilishly handsome ex-Russian assassin with a metal arm and a desperate need to be loved. Although I, you know. Thank you, she says and takes it, before turning her head towards Tony. Thor's a beast in the sack.. We have, Clint says. "Oh shut up Buck. Wait, doesn't that defeat the purpose? Steve asks. Clint never liked those, more one for sharp, searing taste than soft sweetness himself (and wow, isn't that a metaphor for his life). Marvel: The Beast System Chapter 100, a Marvel + Avengers Crossover fanfic | FanFiction. "no matter what everyone else thinks, you're still a loser" a quote by MJ, (this is a chapter) Gender Fluid Loki and a A/N, "I Have A Son" (dc and marvel crossover)(preview), wASSUP FRICKERS(quick question also,memes), PRIDE MONTH, SOLVES ALL YO PROBLEMS BABY(but without my sadness), the final addition to the "if tony was peters bio dad" gif set(endgame spoilers). "Never ever have I accidentally bent metal," Rohdey says and I laugh and take a gulp along with Uncle Bucky and Uncle Steve. Enjoy! Damn, and I have such an asphyxiation kink, too., Clint snorts. Finally, stories regarding Asgard will not revolve around old-time talk. MJ said, her voice unlike he had ever heard, soft and worried and a bit amazed. Ava stole a car and drove way to fast and got us pulled over," I say and Ava glares at me. Field Trip to the Compound (Part Two) (Completed), Not an update but a question for my curiosity, The sun will shine on us again (Part One), Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones but Words Will Always Shatter Me. We're starting. LOKI BABYSITS PETEY (+ EVERYONE ELSE I GUESS), THE LEVEL RED INTERNS (Slight Spideypool), 5 TIMES PETER HELPED THE AVENGERS (+1 TIME THEY HELPED HIM), LIFE GOES ON WITHOUT THEM [ENDGAME SPOILERS], A GHOST OF THE PAST [+ A/N ANNOUNCEMENT AT THE END], CONFINED TO A WHEELCHAIR (FOR LIKE A FEW WEEKS, CHILL), LET ME FALL (REQUESTED PART TWO) [TRIGGER WARNING], IS THE NEW ARM THAT NOTICEABLE? I could send you some info about demisexuality? Bruce asks gently, his hand still lingering on Steve's shoulder. Like a puppy who's peed on the carpet and hasn't been chewed out by its owner yet, but knows what's coming. It's your choice., Yeah, but Tony makes an annoyed sound and rolls over so he's facing Clint. Nice. You expect me to do all the work?. Welp, I'm back from the second week of the holiday-thingy. But apparently, now is the moment to talk. It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye, though, which is why Clint doesn't like playing it. Hope you enjoy and none of the art which I use here belongs to me, so credits to the respective artists or uploaders :). (he was the youngest, and fortunately for him, only had one drink). He sighs and pulls out the ten he has in his pocket. Please consider turning it on! Ask anyone. They were with the mob anyway, they could afford a little lost food., I admire your choice in which establishment to stiff, Tony pointed at Wanda. "Who are you and how did you get past FRIDAY?" I don't have a lot of previous experience, Stark, but no. "We still playing or what? I don't know, Clint. "Why would you ever put a planting pot on your head?" Because this is still a terrible idea, okay? I'll be updating Solangelo At Hogwarts before the end of today, hopefully close after this is up unless the art isn't attached. Then they watched as Thor went for the head. (Clint thinks Thor might actually be drunk at this point, too.) Good morning, Miss Romanoff! Tony doesn't walk into the kitchen. Her locks dangle. Clint figures he'll just steal Nat's drink; he didn't bother to buy anything for tonight, and he doesn't keep alcohol on his floor. Actually fist-bump. Howard Gross takes his son to New York City when he is a child. Worst idea ever, woke up on the ceiling with no memory of how I got there or how I was covered in glitter," I say and everyone nods. Were playing never have I ever!. But she now was at a new school, with new friends and even a boyfriend. Clint closes his eyes and lets his head fall back against the wall. Thanks, he says again. Yeah, sure. No chickening out, Barton, Tony says as he flops down between Clint and Thor. "How do you even do that?" Bi-curious, Peter shrugged, giving Tony a high five when he raised his hand. #spiderman Was it Bucky Barnes? 5 Times The Avengers Broke the Internet and the 1 Time Stony Won The Bet, 2 Times Peter Was Almost Killed and 1 Time Peter and Clint Had 1 Thing In Common, 10 Times An Avenger Picked Him Up From School + 1 Time Tony Did. She hasn't bothered with a glass. I thought we'd made up.. He laughs, and gives Peter a devilish grin. "Never have I ever smoked marijuana," Danny says and everyone but him takes a drink and this seems to surprisethe senior team. I hope you're kidding. Never have I ever Bruce swirls his half-emptied glass once, before looking mischievous. #scarletwitch Mostly because Im messy and spill, Peter mused. Damn, I was so sure, Tony says and taps his finger against his chin. Supposedly Loki was visiting an old ally but Thor and Bruce had shared a look, knowing exactly who the god of mischief was talking about. 1. A lot. Muh?, I'm not gonna send you back into that elevator, Clint says and turns around, slides an arm around Tony's waist and guides him into his apartment. "Never have I ever," Tony was determined to think of something so outrageous that Peter couldn't of possibly done "Killed someone on purpose." Remind me to take you there one of these days, okay? Peter staired Stark directly in the eyes, slowly raising his glass and finished his drink, keeping a blank the entire time. You're going to bed.. Aunt May says and I shrug. Fare thee well, good Banner, Thor slurs, whose Asgardian-ness is even more pronounced now that he's drunk. But 6 minutes after I lifted the building off me I had to go fight him again in Mr. Starks plane that crashed with me on it. But pain leads to power, or so people say, and Agent Sola certainly is powerful. It's a totally valid question!. Clint Barton/ Hawkeye It's entertaining, if not hell on the ear drums. Michelle was even prepared to get the bells from her own room. I did? Tony, Rhodey, Steve, Bucky, Clint, Natasha, and Peter all drank. The Avengers were gathered in the common room, ready with bottles of booze for the drinking game of the century. He lets it go. I'm not really he huffs and his ears grow pinker. Clint wonders, if Steve figured most of the questions asked would be related to sex (and again, Clint wonders whether the good Cap's still got his super-hymen in place), why he still seems so interested. Badly. remain the property of their respective owners. Clint snorts into the good Captain's neck. Last year they played truth or dare that ended up with Peter walking down the side of the Empire State Building, no mask. Tony's the only person Clint knows who can flop miserably. 374 guests Peter stood up. Yes, Barton, I know you love me. But her voice is warm. I don't know if that makes me gay or something else.. That's what Clint's picked up, at least, never actually having gone himself. You turned to the all too familiar voice, breath hitching in your throat as you met the eyes of a certain brown haired person that played one of your favorite su Decided that I would publish a book of one shots and headcanons that people request! "Even if you don't believe the internship, I have heard from his Aunt May that he was saved by Iron Man at the Stark Expo when he was younger, so he has definitely seen the guy very close. Right, Bruce says and pinches the bridge of his nose, the way he usually does when Tony's being insane or Clint's being an asshole. That's all I have to say, so goodbye, until next time, and thank you all (again)! I'd like there to be not running, please. Edit* I've decided to just make this one shots, not just field tr Do you know how once you are doing somethingyou instantlyknow you shouldn't have even thought about doing it? It's warm, a couple of degrees warmer than Tony's body temperature, and Clint reaches out now to splay his hand over it. Yes, Tony, Bruce says in his indulgent and slightly patronising tone, and Clint has another giggle-fit into Nat's shoulder. What if she got kidnapped, a few months before Harry was born and the Potters got attacked on the faithful Halloween night? "We were in a fight and had to get away but were all hurt. Alright, never have I ever woken up still drunk and gone about my day like normal anyway. Natasha said. Ok, never have I ever cried to get out of trouble, Bucky declared. 'Unreasonable asshole' is kind of my personality description. He frowns. Clint snorts and turns over so he can see the annoying asshole he's about to fuck, and sees a strange softness in Tony's smile that he isn't used to. What? Really, Barton? Natasha mutters and drinks with him. Tony grinds down against him, and Clint's hands settle on his hips on their own accord. Wade explained. She is here to pick up Peter for their date that e seems to have not remembered." Then Thor throws his head back and laughs, clinks his jug against Tony's bottle and takes a long swig. What if they asked about being robbed? When they can't sleep. Peed in a suit., Oh, come on, Tony whines. That was really nice., I know, Clint says and doesn't so much sit down as he falls on his ass. Maybe it was because she somehow sensed he was the only one not even slightly drunk. Nat's gorgeous, and people always notice but Clint knows she finds it easier to trust people that don't want to get in her pants. But nope, that's not Clint's deal at all he's been in enough dubious-at-best scenarios to never initiate sex with someone unless they're really really game for it so when he lands in Rogers' lap, he slides his arms around the guy's ridiculously fit torso and pulls him close. Nah, stay here. He's honest-to-god pulled out a huge array of soft, big, fluffy pillows so they can all settle there. Never have I ever Wanda smiled evilly as she side-eyed Tony, done a line of cocaine off a woman I didnt knows ass.. Sort of. Most of the bottle's gone by now, so yeah, he's gonna have a shit day tomorrow. Tony laughs more, and so does Thor, and then Natasha pushes at his back and says bed, now, and Clint stumbles off. To Peter's utter horror, Michelle agreed with a grin, and soon the other members were completely for it, saying "Yaaas!" 3. When they want to. There are still strings. Before Tony can open his mouth to reveal his secret, Natasha sighs. So when Stark Industries called her, desperate for a housekeeper, there was no way in heaven she was gonna refuse. Betty ringed the bell. Other people who are not Clint, obviously. Natasha clinks her bottle with Clint's. "Super strength is a bitch," I say and everyone laughs. Devi eyes one of the sculptures in the garden theyd agreed to meet in, of three people leaning their heads in towards each other until they sort of meld together. Dude Peter sounded somewhat awed. Flash We should get on that, then. Ned Bruce and Steve sit on the other side, and between the six of them they make a semi-neat circle. #ironman 'f I were, y'd be dead. So does Thor. Tony sighs again, dramatically, and glances over at Clint to look for a reaction. I travel because I'm awesome, Tony says. I am wounded that you would think something that awful of me, Agent Romanoff. Honestly of all the IronDad stories, this one is by far the best written, and quite possibly has the best finale I've seen in fanfiction ever. Heh. "Peter!" Tony informed me that the post-battle bonding rituals of Asgard are much different to Midgardian customs, Thor says with a serious nod. Clint's missed this more than he's missed the sex. I'm falling asleep, Bruce says, and there's rustling. But, he had done those things as Spider-Man, so he could just ignore those things. See, that's not playing fair, Barton. "Never ever have I worn a chicken on my head," Aunt Nat says and I take a drink and yet again I'm the only one. Natasha's smirking, but there's no edge to it, and Steve's eyes are brighter than they've been most of the night. Wait.. "I'm Peter's fianc." It was a stray knife, and he had to dodge bullets and make sure the woman was shielded from harm. With Bucky, I was it was good. He breaks the stare he's got going with Bruce and opts for staring at the floor with a lost look. Holy shit that was a amazhang thing to come back to, I can't thank you lot enough. "Never ever have I gotten shot," Aunt May says and everyone but her, Shuri, T'chall, and Scott takes a drink. All of the Avengers and Wade took a shot or for Wade, a sip of a juice box. "Explain, now. Are you, like are you?. What Clint doesn't expect is for Thor and Bruce to drink; the first with his usual vigor, the latter with his eyes on the floor and color high in his cheeks. The game was being set up, and Peter could hear all the whispered ideas from his teammates. He struts, like a fucking rooster, and Clint rolls his eyes. Instead, he closes his eyes and tries to sleep, and lets his hand find Tony's deceptively soft hair. A strong, almost sickly sweet wooden aroma fills the air, and Thor takes a deep whiff before sighing with contentment. Avenger's imagines and preferences! Sorta, Clint says. which, to be fair, was a good point. Clint kind of wants to hug the guy. "Never have I ever kissed someone of the same sex," Scott says and everyone but Uncle Rohdey, Aunt May and him takes a drink. Okay, that's it, Clint says, because seriously, the guy looks like a puppy. #marvel He knew Sally was lesbian or bi, but with MJ he didn't know. Never have I ever kept and used screenshots as blackmail, Tony said eyeing Natasha. A small, annoying part of him wonders if Tony's actually been personally acquainted with Captain America's dick and adds that if Clint wants to find out, this would be the perfect opportunity. Not even a little? comes Tony's voice, sulking. Steve makes another squeaky sound, but less panicked this time, and Clint leans his head on the Captain's shoulder and presses their cheeks together. We are, aren't we?. Vague snorts from the rest of the team. But Devi Vishwakumar was something else entirely. 52: Jessica Jones [03] . So why are you asking us to date, then?, Tony deflates a little, caught between looking sulky and dejected. I thought it was just a month and three weeks., Nope, she says and somehow manages to get behind the Captain, driving him to the floor with a well-aimed kick to the back of his knees. Clint just huffs, a sign of his exhaustion right there, and wrings off his clothes. And out of those two, only one can be remedied, I'm afraid. Tony sighs dramatically before he straddles Clint and brushes their lips together. Or why Clint knows about shipping. #steverogers This way, Clint can make sure that it's not hot enough to scald Tony's throat and tongue. It was Peter's 21st birthday. But Steve smiles and nods, still looking sad but not too much. AU: Devi and Paxton never broke up, and Devi and Des are just friends. It's my vanishing act." Is it just in a suit, or on a suit as well?. Abe ringed the bell. developers, or authors from publishing works on this site. Clint chuckled. You mentioned that.. They always did one dumb ass thing for his birthday each year. Clint wouldn't have pegged him as particularly bendy, but here he is, pulling off a move even Clint struggles with on some days. It's not about lying, Bruce explains. (REQUESTED PART TWO), THE SPIDERVERSE: HUNTING SPIDER (REQUEST), THE LIFE OF PETER PARKER THE INTERN (HE'S ALSO SPIDER-MAN BUT HUSH), PETER BEING MULTILINGUAL (REQUESTED PART TWO). And okay, Tony was sort of expected, because, well. Mmm, neat. Thor looks thoroughly charmed. #peterparker Am I correct in that deduction? Vision asked. Really? Steve says, barely winded, kicking Natasha in the stomach, but she twists enough that it barely grazes her. Don't ask.. D'nt care. Awesome! He was never robbed, but the other he had dealt his fair share with them, just never as the victim. An angry voice cried out. To absolutely no one's surprise, Tony's really good in bed. Natasha was pouring out shots of vodka, a new bottle she had 'found' while away, and Tony was looking around under the bar for a non-alcoholic drink to give to Peter. Tony and Clint were the only ones to drink. Oh my god I cant believe I didnt think of that, Tony looked amazed at the gap in his thinking. Tony, stop being judgemental. And he can't help but be a little impressed, himself Thor he might understand, but the other two? Nat, Sam, Clint, and Peter took a shot. Move along, Rhodey continued to scowl, glaring murderously at Tony. I mean, are there any questions off-limits, or, Yes, Natasha and Clint say just as Tony says Nope, none!, Tony glares at them. Are you trying to get a full set or something? Clint asks, because it's pretty obvious that Thor and Bruce haven't tangoed, and he knows Natasha hasn't slept with any of them aside from Clint, of course, but that's years ago now. Come oooon, he says now, and waggles his eyebrows in a seductive way that is about as sexy as the thought of Fury wearing a banana hammock. Though, he admitted in his mind, he had been beaten up in and outside of plenty before the serum. Ben goes to a Clippers game with both Howard and Devi. When Clint wakes the next morning, cotton-mouthed and heavy with a pounding hangover-headache, there's a dick poking into his ass. Except Pepper. For some reason a few members had brought alcohol, and now they were all sitting in Flash' and Abe's shared hotel room, drinking shots with the plastic cups from the bathrooms. So he sulks a little, maybe, when he's alone in his bed. Mmm. It's been great, guys.. So, even though he wanted to make some moves on her, he refrained from going near her and focused on his stuff. "Really?" Bucky wolf whistled. "What? They all turned to Nat. You were doing so well. He's on his third glass by now, and most of them are getting foggy. Moving on! "I may or may not have a boyfriend." "Mr. Stark this is Michelle Jones. Abe was laughing quite loudly at a joke Charles was telling. MJ walked in wearing a fancy dress. Tony blinks, surprised, and his hands still in Clint's cropped hair. She joined HYDRA's ranks at the age of thirteen and has steadily been risin Lucienne "Lucy" Ridley has lived for almost 1000 years, predating the first Avenger himself. I thought we agreed that wouldn't be a good idea., No no, Tony says and shakes his head violently, something that throws him off-balance again. ! They all seemed to collectively cry. Peter smiled, he never knew this. Fuck, Tony says and stares at the wall. Weakling, she mutters in Russian and Clint grimaces. And, I might add, the suit had a filtration system.. Of course, it does help that you're, like, mind-numbingly hot., Why, Mister Stark, Clint says and bats his eyelashes. ", "Sure," Thor sat up a little straighter, pondering what on earth he could say "Never have I ever been arrested more than once. So he stumbles through the long hallway leaving to their other sleeping quarters that Tony got them probably for this exact reason, Clint muses as he bumps into walls and doors. Yeah? Clint says and picks up one of the acidic arrows; a prototype he's testing for Tony. Also any that come to my fruity brain in between my slow story updates. He's still kind of horny, but he's also tired, so he can't be bothered to get off on his own right now. So after a mission, I y'know.. Never have I evergone commando, Natasha disclosed. 's good, Clint slurs into his best friend's shirt. On really slow nights, when they're bored. Nope, Clint says. Given the fact that they were all heroes and grown-up's or teens, the questions were going to be odd but I never thought it would be this odd. Before sex, during, after. There's one problem. Peter had never been drunk before, and now that he knew how quick his metabolism had cleaned his blood of the intoxicating stuff, he wasn't afraid anymore to take a drink with the team now and then. Of course we do, Clint says and grins. So, how does this work? Steve asks now, all childlike interest and polite excitement at his team's bonding activity. as well as Two months, just about, Natasha says and twists to jab an elbow in Steve's side before ducking to avoid a fist in the face. He knows hers, too. I have an ally! The elevator dinged. He stays like that for another minute, listening to Steve's calm heartbeat against his own chest, before he disentangles, stands up and goes back to his pillows, ruffling Steve's hair on the way. Not more running, at least, which I totally admit, I did most of the running, but yeah. "Language!" She'll kick his ass on the next training, but that's cool. There is a mentioning of an injury, but it is not too descriptive. Yeah like that was surprising, Wanda rolled her eyes. The spider kid was sat crossed-legged on the floor in front of the armchair Tony was sitting on. "You doing that face is only proving the fact you're a child even more," Tony rolled his eyes, smirking, and helped Natasha carry the rest of the drinks to the coffee table, which the rest of the team was sitting around (those who were still there, that is). I mean that literally.. Yeah, you're doing a bang-up job, Tony., Aaaand we're back on first-name basis! Tony says and does an actual fucking fist-punch in the air. It's strangely nice. Peter said. WHAT HAPPENS WHEN A MURDER VICTIM TURNS UP ON YOUR DOOR? Clint flips him the bird without looking at him. Yeah, 'cause there were a lot of strings! Tony says, and sounds delighted that Clint gets it even though Clint really doesn't get it. Well, there you go. Tony's fingers trace a scar on Clint's lower back; stray bullet, Prague. 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